FDC #49: You’ll Never Believe What Restaurant We Went To This Month! (It’s JUN)

Wow, you clicked! And because you’re a ✨SPECIAL✨ visitor, we’ve got a special review for you this month! A 2-for-1!

That’s right, this month we had two meals: JUN and… JUN! What?! OMG!

Yes, that’s right, on a fateful Tuesday in October, two of us — Matt and myself — went to JUN twice! In the same day!

Great question. I’ll let you in on a little insider biz magic: we went once for lunch… and again for dinner.

I know! If you’ve never had the experience of eating somewhere for lunch, then returning a few hours later only to have the same server at almost the same table never once acknowledge that he obviously remembers you from earlier, I suggest you try it. It’s really… a thing.

But how to keep everything straight??? Well you guessed it — I’m channeling my inner Buzzfeed and giving the people what they want:

A LIST!!!! And tooooooooonnnnns of GIFs! #omg #wow #mom

We’re counting down from dishes I wouldn’t eat again to dishes I oh. so. TOTALLY. would DEFINITELY. eat again, like omg #thebest #squadgoals, using bad notes, even worse pictures, and a month-old memory. How could this go wrong? And make sure you read to the end — #2 made me L.?.O.?.L! (Just kidding, no it didn’t, why the fuck would you think that?) Anyway…

13-11: These Dumplings that have all blended together in my memory:

From left to right it’s shumai, chive dumplings, and scallop dumplings — probably. I’m honestly not positive I have the order right. I’m pretty sure, but the menu lists some ingredients that aren’t in these pics, so I’m not ?. That’s… not a great sign. My notes, also, are predictably unhelpful. Like, the scallop dumplings had “lots of flavor,” and the scallops themselves were “good, rather than bad, which can happen with scallops.” I PAINT PICTURES WITH MY WORDS, OK?!

10: These Crispy Sticky Rice Dumplings that shouldn’t exist but somehow do because this is why we can’t have nice things:

How do you NOT get slightly sweet “Crispy Sticky Rice Dumplings?” Well, we did. But here’s the thing: name me one dish that’s both sweet and has mushrooms in it. OK, fine, yes, these dumplings. Can’t think of another? There’s a reason for that.

9: These cuties taking a bath:

Could. Eat. That. Broth. For. Days! The curry powder, ginger and sesame oil all combined to punch through tons of flavor with a taste familiar yet hard to pin down. Howeverrrrrr, the octopus started out a little tough, and only got tougher as it sat in that hot ??? broth. The first bites were good, but by the end it was just rubber. I hate to waste food, but it was literally (LITERALLY!) uneatable.





8: These Baos which in English are called buns #hehe #whoknew:

I love me some buns, especially ones with spiced pork inside. These buns were firmer than the softly steamed buns that I love, so they weren’t as delectably chewy, but they weren’t bad by any means, and the pork was sweet and juicy. JUN has sweet and juicy buns, everyone. Get on it!

7: TFW the menu isn’t in English and you just point to something hoping it’s good:

Now that we’ve covered almost our entire lunch (only one thing missing — what could it be??? Keep reading to find out!), it’s time for dinner.

Overall, dinner was the much better meal, but both were good. JUN feels like the kind of Chinese food you could order anywhere, but none of the dishes were greasy, and we left feeling bright, rather than weighed down from the overabundance of vegetable oil soup at most corner Cantonese places, clear marks of quality and craft in JUN’s favor. We didn’t see huge crowds either during lunch or dinner, which is a shame, because JUN served up multiple plates of food I’ve never encountered in Minneapolis or anywhere I’ve been. Like…


#jklol on the just pointing to something — we knew we were ordering intestines. And they were good! Though they basically just tasted like Fried. Fried meat and fried bell pepper.

6: These Chinese TACOS:

O.M.G. Who knew China had tacos??? (OK, now this bit might have gone too far. These are not tacos, I am a stupid white American. Let’s just move on…)

5: This WHOLE bowl of tofu:




You won’t believe this is fifth! Because I honestly can’t believe this is fifth! This was REALLY good. You’ll have to take my word for it, though, because do I remember what made it so good? I do not. Know what former me felt was important to remember about it? “Very tofu-y.”

4: These noods that did have sauce (at the bottom) so they weren’t in the nood #LOL:

I was excited for these after my first dan dan noods experience at Han Dynasty in Philly. Those noods were on another level, which unfortunately made these noods pale in comparison. But I have them ranked just ahead of the dish I couldn’t believe was only fifth, so you know they were still REAL good. The noods were cooked past al dente, but they weren’t mushy — they were just soft and decadent. I’m salivating again just remembering how comforting those noods were, and we’re only at Number 4!


3: This plate that was short on rib but long on deliciousness:

This was the clear winner from Meal #1. My notes even say “best thing, easily.” I was so happy near the end when I looked over at Matt’s plate and saw way more bones than on my plate and realized that the rest of the ribs were ALL MINE. I also made a note to say: “So much flavor, perfectly cooked. Winner winner… Short rib… lunch?”

Why yes, I am a (semi-)professional comedian. Why do you ask?

2: This beef dish with a SURPRISE twist:

This barely edges the short rib, mainly because it was served cold, which is a fact that blew my mind. It packed so much flavor, and the meat was tender, and yes I know it was supposed to be cold, but whenever I think of cold beef (and boy do I ever!) I immediately jump to an image of leftovers that are chewy and a bit mealy. This was none of those things. It was served exactly how it was meant to be, and it was beautiful. (Did this make you L?O?L? I… don’t care. Why did you even remember that?)


1:  These noods that were so #chow, so #fun and DEFINITELY #squadgoals:

This was the best thing we ate over the course of two meals, and, tbh, it wasn’t even close. Big press was made when JUN opened that they were hand-making their noods with an ancient Chinese method, and these are the noods to which that story was referring. But it wasn’t just the noods. I mean, it was the noods — they were soft but firm, and I know that makes no sense, but you just have to go with me here. Despite my stated ability to paint with words, I don’t have the words for what happened with these. They are incredible. They come with a sauce that is even better; it has flavors that I don’t understand. Like Michelangelo standing on a scaffold, arm defying gravity, for FOUR YEARS painting a 6,000 square-foot ceiling, I can’t even comprehend how it was accomplished. It’s LITERALLY breathtakingly good. Eat this — before it’s too late. If you need a reason to visit — as Matt said, “You come here for noodles… and intestines.” (#QuoteOfTheNight #QOTN)